My Sweet Grandma.....

This is a letter I wrote to my grandmother a while ago.... she had a stroke today... I cried harder than I can ever remember crying. All I could think to do was tell the whole world what I think of my Grandma. So I wanted this letter out there... I love my grandma... She will be okay... she needs to be okay.

My Dear Grandma,

I can't tell you how much I hate writing you this letter, it means that I am not there with you, and that is a pain that cuts me very deep. I know you are suffering and feeling tired. I wish I could take your suffering away, I can't. I can tell you I am praying, but no one's prayers are heard more clearly than yours. I am sad right now and don't want you to feel like this letter is a goodbye, this is not the final hour, the day or year. Only God has claim on that. But I did not want another day to go by without me telling you what you have meant to me and the rest of your family.

You are a foundation, a rock that all of your family has come to rely upon. You are the soft sunlight that makes the garden of your family grow. You are my personal inspiration, my David, the one whom I look to for guidance because your flaws give me self acceptance, your humility keeps me humble, your passion gives me a reason to wake up every morning and make more right or wrong choices in my life. You have had a beautifully messy life like the rest of us, you however have done something most of us can not. You have done it with grace and created in yourself a woman of honor, dignity and responsibility. You have such a heart, so full with love and compassion. You care for everyone, love everyone, value everyone. You are the fairy-godmother, the sage, the Rosie, the Elizabeth Bennet...... you are a mother, and my grandmother who I love beyond measure. There are not enough words to describe the complexities that are you, but nonetheless, the simple thing to say is that I love every bit of you. You were there when others weren't, you guided me and had hope for me, how can I thank you? We have always had a special connection, I see so many similarities in you and I. I only hope that one day I will have the opportunity to show you again how very much I love you, but until then, goodnight sweet grandma, rest well , feel better and know that I am thinking of you.

I'll be seeing you,

xo,

Carrie Lee